Quiet Time With Spike and Willow
by Drusilla Lolitta
Summary: 300 Years in the Future SPike and willow sit down with a Demon Dan Rather and tell their tale.


*Cheesy theme music plays in the background *  
  
"Good evening and welcome to" the camera zooms into see a demon looking Dan Rather sitting in a black leather chair in a rather beaten looking suit which was at one time an Armani we guess, "Quiet time with the Great Killers of Our Time tonight I'm talking with The Great William The bloody better known as Spike and his companion and equally evil love, Willow," camera zooms to them Spike is wearing his usual leather coat leaning back smoking a cigarette with an evil grin on his human face he nods in Dan's direction and looks to willow who smiles also, "Well...Spike let me first say thank you for coming...we know you like to keep a low profile lately seeing as the slayer is quite angry with you. But you have taken the time to sit with me and I thank you," looks to willow and nods, "wonderful to see you too, "looks back to spike," let me first start out by asking you what you think or favorite victim was Who was the most fun...or excuse me...which one gave you the most pleasure?"  
  
Spike grinned evil and put his arm around willow and took a drag from his cigarette, "She was...*laugh* my red...never found a human I liked so much before and to watch the life drain from her body that was more joy than....''ell killing a slayer...though those are damn high on my list," smiles taking a drag.  
  
Dan nods, "Willow.... You've been around for what 300 years now since spike here turned you right? What would you say is your greatest conquest...? Greatest...kill...?" Willow grinned running her tongue along her fangs looking Dan up and down slowly; She stands wearing all leather and slowly walks over to Dan sitting in his lap straddling him. Slowly running a hand down his neck, then his chest, "I'd have to say so far my greatest kill would have had to have been that annoying broadcaster Bryant Gumble," She grins evily at Dan.  
  
Dan moved uneasy in his chair, "alright then...*cough* alright something we are all dyeing to know.... What did you two do to Drusilla and Buffy? We already know you turned the slayer but what then...where are they? And her boy? What did you do?" Spike grinned, "Well Dan I guess that's one of those great mysteries ain't it...if you don't know by now what we did with my ex and the slayer and her...whelp then," he shook his head, "well guess you just asking the wrong people." Dan nodded, "Alright...well then...things have changed a great deal since you were William the bloody, what disgusts you both the most about the Demons today?" Spike groaned, "to bloody soft..." he leans forward, "were demons man...were meant to ravage and kill...spill the blood of the innocent..." he growled, "not help the slayer and her watchers," he shakes his head, "no ones got any balls these days...and using blasted technology to go feed that's a damn shame...I live for the hunt...the kill...the way they wiggle in your hands and beg for mercy," he gripped his hands together and leaned back suddenly, "no one does it right anymore..." he took another drag and smiled looking to willow. Willow grins and steps back off of Dan, slowly walks over behind Spike wrapping a arm around him leaning down kissing his neck her hand slowly moving up and down his chest, then she looks up at Dan with menacing look on her face, "I believe the most disgusting thing I've found is the way they all try to make a name for themselves in the human world, and on the hell mouth." Spike smiled holding his lover running his fingers sharply over her skin with a grin; "I agree luv...damn shame...everyone's got to be like spike..." She nuzzles him with a nods gently nipping at him neck, "mmmm.... They just want to be a big bad...when really..." She looks up at Dan, "They're nothing but annoying."  
  
Dan nodded, "next question..." he was obviously scared and looked to his paper and then to the camera man," oh well we've got to take a break" he smiles, "we'll be right back," screen fades black and Dan looks to spike and willow shaking he jumps up and out of site.  
  
Spike laughed evily, "think we scared him luv...."She giggles and walks over in front of Spike, "That's good... *Smirks* Can I eat him now? Or you know maybe break his neck like a little dove?" Spike shook his head, "not yet luv...we've got yet to finish the show..." he grinned pulling willow into his lap, "I kind of like this one...Hess scared...I love the smell of fear..." he kissed at her neck and smiled, 'sides...think we should at least let him out with a bang pet...tell I'm what we did with the slayer and Dru...might do him a bit of good...then ...you can eat who ever you like..." She nods smiling, "Okay baby," She softly touches his cheek and kissed him deeply then pulled back waiting to come off of break. Dan came back not looking to the couple he looked to the cameraman, "ok 10?" he looked to spike a willow, "thank you for doing this..." he coughed and looked back to the camera a smile on his face, "alright and...We're back welcome back to Quiet time with the great killers of our time...where you can send in questions to ask some of the greatest killers of our time...we're here with Spike and Willow 2 of the greatest Master Vampires in history. Thank you both for joining us...Why don't you 2 tell us a little about yourselves...let us get to know the demons behind the image..."he shook visibly as the cameras panned to the couple. Spike laughed, "That what you really like to know Dan?" he looked to willow, "I don't think that's what the bloke really wants to hear luv is it?" Willow shakes her head and looks at Dan then to Spike, "I don't think his stomach could handle it." Spike smiled* well Dan...wanna try again...?" He shook and coughed, "I uhm.... Let's go to the phones shall we? Caller your on the line...what would you like to ask Spike and Willow?"  
  
Caller 1: An English voice comes over the line with a cough, "Um yes...what ever happened to erm. To Buffy, Xander, and Ripper?" Spike laughed, "well...luv why dont you tell us...." he looked to Willow, "what did you do with the watcher." Willow raises her eye brow and smirks He was one of my greater conquests...as far as I know his ex-tweed wearing arse is in England drinking like a fish due to the fact that Buffy is dead..." looks to Spike, "That's the last I heard." Spike smiled, "poor bloke...What a waste of a god.... Too bad his precious slayer isn't as dead as he thinks he luv..." he looks to Dan and smiles, "tell you what ...Dan...were gonna let you and your...viewers in on a little secret, you like to know what we did with Drusilla...and that wreched slayer and her whelp? We're gonna tell you." Willow leaned back against Spike and nuzzled him; "Well it happened after I had my first taste of real evil." Dan took a deep breath, "alright well." he was amazed and damn happy this meant that he wasn't going to die after all, "Oh really..." Spike nodded, "yep...she did d bloody good job if I say so.it was 2002.... Red nearly killed the lot of us with some major wicked magicks.... But Xander...the whelp.... Stopped her and well...everyone lived obviously...*he lit another smoke* I got slapped with a fucking soul...and wasn't a bit happy about it...so I found red here bout to hang her self and since my little bout with the slayer I kinda liked 'er and made a deal with her and lost the soul and turned er...." he kissed willow, "then she decided she wanted a bit o fun...so we found the slayer and her kid sis and oh well why don't you tell them luv...?" Willow sat up slowly thinking back to the day, "Well...After I had my experience with hard magi's and being a big bad the slayer and her kid sister acted differently towards me. Like spike said we met up and after I turned it went back to hell. Buffy and I got into and I kicked every square inch of her ass, and well I sort of borrowed spike here and had him help me. We drug her body down to Ripper's place and tacked her up on his bedroom ceiling along with her sister who got into the fight with me and Buffy." Shakes her head, "such a shame her sister had the attitude to be a great big bad." Spike nodded, "lil bitch was annoying but had a pure evil heart in there. Well...for fun we secretly turned the slayer and left her to the wall for ripper to find and of course he just left the bloody country...now Xander...we played with him.... He was the king of goody 2 shoes.... He was fun to play with.... But Drusilla decided she wanted to have a reunion and showed up at the crypt and wasn't a bit happy about finding me and red here in the bed with a turned slayer and her whelp all chained to the walls.... So we chained 'er up too and well my baby's got a new puppy.... *Laughs* I though she was insane...oh Willow makes killing an art...like a beautiful painting..."he grinned. Willow smirks, "Well...With Dru I ripped open her shirt and placed a pretty silver cross on her pretty skin while I listened to her scream. Once it was an in bedded shape I took it off then I continued drawing little designs around the cross," Smiles in dream like way, "It really was beautiful...kind of like a vampire Van Gough painting" Spike nodded, "she was a beautiful sight....until she started whining about my wanker of a sire and I just off and staked her I got tired of her bloody whining...as for the whelp and the Slayer...well...we've still got them around...keeps us entertained...not to mention the huge number of ways a you can play with an undead slayer" Willow grins and looks to spike, "It's more of a challenge to fight with a slayer that's a vampire." Dan nodded swallowing deeply, "I see...well just what everyone has been wondering," his mind was racing what kind of peo....demons would do that but then again it was a stupid question, "uh well were gonna take one last call before were out of time," he pushed the button, "caller?"  
  
Caller 2: "OH MY GOD!!!" the voice was high pitched and young sounding. "OK ok ...wow...ok I have to say WOW first and second...like...spike...your hot..and and willow...oh god your hot too!!! and like I SOOO worship you two I just wanted you to know that and uhm uhm...if you ever need a new puppy look me up!!!" Spike laughed, "well...thanks pet..." he shook his head laughing, "looks like we've got a fan club luv..." Willow laughs and shakes her head wrapping, "I don't share spike...with anyone." Dan nodded, "well that's interesting end note I wanna thank Spike and willow for joining me and thank you for watching and we'll see you next week when we sit down with Angelus and Connor...." he smiles, "see you then..." the screen fades back the the crew get up and leave. Spike looks to willow "yes luv now you can." She smirks and stands. She walks over to Dan slowlyruns her hand along his chest So um...are you full demon, part demon part human or what?" Dan sat straight up, "me I uhm.." he looked toward spike and found him gone" "uhm....uhm..."he swallowed hard. She smirks evily and licks her fangs, "Well? You never answered my question," Slowly licks his neck. "i'm uhm human, uhm demon genes, that's that's why im still a..alive," he pushed against the chair trying to move. She smirks, "Really and I thought you were part demon...what are you doing here on a demon broadcasting system...isn't that against laws?" He shrugged, "made a deal with the guy that uhm...owns the station said he wouldnt kill me if i got you two on" She smirks and kisses his neck, "hmmmm wanna play a little game?" He shrugged, "uhm..no offense but no thanks " She nods and looks away with a pout, "Oh all right," She smirks and turns back her face vamped, "Then run." He stood and screamed, "Shit!!!" he took off running and tured back to look for willow and ran straight into spike and fell back, "ouch AHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Spike laughed, "luv your foods getting away" Willow smirked and walked over picking Dan up, "No he wasnt getting away..I was playing cat and mouse with him..guess who won?" She Sunk her teeth viciously into his neck holding his quivering body tight against hers as she fed. Spike smiled, "nice job pet.... Oh very clean not a drop," he vamped and smiled pulling the body away from her he kissed her deeply, " nice show pet.... We should do this more often.... Maybe do a teaching show? You'd be a bloody good Porn actress luv" he grinned through his fangs and smiled as they both laughed. 


End file.
